I'm going to my first conference where the conference hotel is an actual option, and I'm not sure whether I should stay there. Part of me likes the convenience, but part of me would rather stay somewhere cheaper and have a little distance from colleagues. For people who attend conferences regularly, how do you decide?
Do you stay at the conference hotel?
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I usually stay at the conference hotel if the price is reasonable. Being able to go upstairs between sessions is a huge convenience. You can drop off your bag, take a break, make a last-minute change to your presentation, or just sit somewhere quiet for twenty minutes. I also like not having to commute after an evening reception.
I stayed elsewhere throughout grad school because the conference hotel was usually much more expensive. A few people from my cohort would split a cheaper place, and that saved a lot. I didn't mind walking or taking transit. Now that I travel more for work, I'm more likely to pay for the convenience if my institution will reimburse it.
Check your university's travel rules before deciding. At my institution, the official conference hotel can actually be easier to get approved than a cheaper alternative. Other hotels may fall under a strict nightly cap, and then you have to explain transportation, parking, or other costs. I once stayed in an Airbnb farther away and the reimbursement paperwork was much worse than expected.
There is also a networking advantage to staying at the conference hotel. A lot of informal conversations happen at breakfast, in the lobby, at the bar, or after the evening events. You don't have to force yourself to network, but you naturally run into people. That said, I don't think you need to stay there just to prove you are participating.
For me it depends on the conference. If the sessions are actually in the hotel, I'm much more likely to stay there. If the hotel is expensive and the conference venue is easy to reach by public transportation, I'll often book somewhere else. I also look at how late the social events run. A cheap hotel stops being cheap if you are paying for rides back and forth every night.
The whole pajama issue would not factor into my decision. You don't have to walk around the hotel in your pajamas. If you want a drink or need something from downstairs, put on regular clothes and go. Honestly, seeing colleagues outside the formal conference setting can make them seem more human, not less professional.
I think there is a reasonable middle ground. Compare the total cost, not just the room rate: transportation, parking, meals, commute time, and the value of being able to return to your room during the day. If staying at the conference hotel costs only a little more, I usually choose it. If it is hundreds more and I can get to the conference easily from another hotel, I keep the money.