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What's your worst first conference presentation story?

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I just gave one of my first conference presentations and it felt like a complete mess. I finished writing the talk right before I had to give it, rushed through parts of it, and went over time. I actually like public speaking, which somehow made me feel worse because I thought I should have done better. I know I need to prepare earlier and rehearse, but I'm curious how bad everyone else's first conference talks really were. Did anyone have a presentation go completely sideways and still recover from it?
My first talk went the opposite way. I was so nervous that I raced through a presentation that was supposed to take about half an hour. I finished way too early and only realized afterward how fast I had been talking. It was embarrassing at the time, but I learned pretty quickly that knowing the material isn't the same thing as practicing the actual delivery.
The technology failed during mine. The presentation computer had trouble opening my slides, and we ended up scrambling to get the file working. Another time the projector stopped in the middle of the talk. I think the lesson is to have a backup copy and be prepared to explain your main point without the slides if you have to.
My first poster was almost a disaster before I even got to the conference. The printer I was planning to use was unavailable, then the backup printing service lost track of the poster. I eventually found a local place that could print it at the last minute. I was standing there waiting for it right up until the poster session started. After that I started treating poster printing like part of the research deadline, not something to deal with the day before.
One thing that helped me was realizing the audience usually isn't waiting for you to fail. Most people are there to hear the research, and if something goes wrong they generally move on. I've also learned that it's okay to say, 'I don't know, but I can look into that,' instead of trying to invent an answer to a question you weren't prepared for.
Timing is a bigger problem than people realize. I use a separate timer when I practice and build in a little extra room at the end. If you have trouble seeing the session chair's time warnings, tell them before the presentation starts and agree on a signal that you can actually see. There's no reason to discover during the talk that you can't read the clock or the chair's cues.
I think most first presentations are partly a learning experience. You find out what makes you nervous, what questions you can answer easily, and where your talk is too long or too complicated. Ask someone you trust for specific feedback instead of just asking whether it was good. Then fix one or two things and do the next presentation. A bad first talk doesn't have to become a permanent memory of how you present.

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